It’s Hogmanay, New Year’s Eve, the last day of the current year, and I sit here with a list of resolutions, swayed not by the common pitchfork attitude of how awful the “new year, new me” community is, and instead I vow to myself to keep trying. To try HARDER. These resolutions are not ways to revamp my whole life, or completely change. They are meant to be encouraging, thankful that we are given fresh starts. We get the blessing to wake up at least one more time, so why NOT serve to do better?
2015 started for me with a sense of finding my new growth. To move forward and to be the new best Debbie I could possibly be. I still stick with that resolution. I wont feel badly that I didn’t complete my master task of self promises for this year, and instead I will look at what I DID accomplish, and not what I didn’t check off.
Ive learned its okay if I don’t mark off everything on my daily to-do lists. Life will go on anyway. Its okay that I don’t have a 6 pack of beautiful abs, I am healthy, and worked out, and tried. I adjust the safe zones of where my adorable husband can hug me, and I still (as does he) think Im okay looking the way I do. Its okay that I didn’t win glorious awards and photographic accolades, because my clients smiled when they received their images, and referred me to their friends and family members, which is what I do this for anyway. Its okay that I struggled in motherhood. Each year brings fresh challenges with no guidebook and I have to wing things, and fight my way through them, often without achieving what I wanted to do, sometimes with tears, and (more than I wanted to), with some yelling and fights. However my girls were loved, taken care of, fed, clothed and encouraged. Ive also sadly lost some friendships that I cared deeply about, and that has to be okay too, even though its painful, for I really have to accept the seasons of the relationships that enter my life. God has placed new people in my life who not only come with a friendship, but have opened my eyes to new dreams, new paths, and showed me you are never too old to start something new. Ive learned that I can’t go forward while looking back. I want to grow. I want my personal life, my home base AND my business all to evolve. Ive taken the steps to do that: partnered with one amazing team, to encourage other female boss ladies as part of the Modern Femme Conference; enrolled in the Master’s AKademy with my ever motivating mentor, Abbey Kyhl and I cannot wait for this multi week long learning and advancement process, unlike ANY other mentoring experience Ive attended. I have writing classes now, to long fulfill my ultimate dream of writing a book! I am beyond excited to have actually sat down and created a writing plan and time to actually do this, and explore my creative outlets, and one way to help was actually having OFFICE SPACE!!! This alone is a huge dream! Along those lines, I also started a small homemade gift business, creating mugs and stamping jewelry. Not to be a million dollar business but without doubt a craft I want to grow! I have served more this year than any other year of my life, and this is something I want to invest more of my time into. I believe we can make a better world by being better people. I want to be kept humble because I know it could be worse, and I want to be thankful, because Ive known worse. One way I can do this, is with being accepted as a Magic Hour Photographer and my signing up for next years Dressember and Feed Supper, both supporting causes I am wanting to help more.
I know there will be many changes in my life this year. There always are changes. I have a lot to look forward too, and a lot that probably wont get done, and thats okay too. First to change will be this blog. No longer wanting to be boxed into ONLY a photographer, I want to use this great tool as an online journal of sorts, to map out and plan and replay the adventures that happen to me in parenting teens and college kids, my writing journey, the conference with MFM, my photography and also my personal journey as a woman in her 40’s finally accepting that beautifully broken is her own sweet kind of perfect! HAPPY NEW YEAR 2016!!!